When the child's parent is living in your home.
Sharing a home can support a family, but it can also blur authority. Clear roles, household rules and safety expectations protect the child and the adults.
Part of our Caregiver Wellbeing resource series. See the main Caregiver Wellbeing guide for the wider topic and related resources. Following a guided route? Return to the Parent contact & family-safety route.
Information reviewed September 2026. Services, program rules and eligibility can change, so use the linked source for current information.
Living under one roof can blur who is actually parenting.
Some kinship caregivers take in both the child and the child's parent. Others allow a parent to move back after treatment, incarceration, housing loss or a relationship breakdown. The arrangement can work, but only if the adults understand who is responsible for the child's daily care.
Write down the household expectations before conflict starts.
- Who gets the child up and to school?
- Who attends appointments?
- Who disciplines the child?
- Who pays for what?
- Can the parent have visitors?
- Are substances permitted in the home?
- What are the rules about overnight absences?
- Who can make legal, school or medical decisions?
The caregiver needs authority that matches responsibility.
If you are expected to be accountable for school, health care and safety while the parent can reverse every decision, the household can become unstable quickly. Clarify the legal arrangement rather than relying only on family roles.
Do not let the child become the referee.
A child should not be asked whether the parent or grandparent is “the real boss.” Adults need to resolve disagreements privately and present consistent expectations where possible.
Recovery and reunification need more than shared housing.
A parent living in the same home may be part of rebuilding stability, but physical presence does not itself show that protection concerns are resolved or that the parent is ready to resume full responsibility. In a Child Protection case, follow the Family Intervention Plan and worker guidance.
Substance use requires clear safety limits.
If substance use is part of the history, decide what behaviour would make the home unsafe, what will happen if substance use returns and who should be contacted. Do not wait until a crisis to decide whether intoxication around the child is acceptable.
Money and housing can create pressure.
Be clear about rent, groceries, transportation, household contributions and whether the arrangement is temporary. Avoid using the child's benefit payments to finance the parent's unrelated expenses.
Privacy still matters.
The child may need private time with the caregiver, counsellor, teacher or worker even when the parent lives in the home. A parent should not automatically be included in every conversation simply because they are physically present.
If the arrangement stops working.
Separate the housing issue from the child's legal status. Removing a parent from the home, ending contact and changing who has custody are not the same thing. Use legal advice or the responsible Child Protection worker where the arrangement is formal.
If recovery and shared housing overlap
Use the recovery and boundaries guide to decide household rules and what changes if substance use returns.
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